Monday, May 23, 2011

Small Talk and Heartburn

I’m back from an eventful weekend at home with my family celebrating my little sister’s High School Graduation.Here is a list of things I learned:

Outdoor, summer graduations should be illegal in Florida

1. High School Graduations make me feel old.

2. If my interactions with my extended family were graded, I would get an F+.
3. When you mix three generations at a party, everyone feels out of place. 

4. If someone overhears a conversation about Call of Duty: Black Ops between you and one of your friends, they may assume he is an Iraqi war veteran. 

5. Plunging a stopped-up toilet for an embarrassed child means you are a real adult.

6. Some frosting-covered brownie cakes aren’t as delicious as they should be.

7. Pirates of the Carribean: On Stranger Tides is a terrible movie that should have never been made. Shame on you, Johnny Depp.
8. Banks hire security guards to make sure their 95% empty, massive parking lots are safe from desperate parents looking for a place to park to see their child graduate high school.

9. "Here’s to the Night" by Eve 6 should be retired as a viable class song. Also, it should never be attempted by a high-school chorus.

10. I can no longer fill up on hors d'oeuvres and still eat a gigantic slab of pork without feeling sick.

See you guys tomorrow!

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